Conversation with Self

People tell me I’m self-centered, and I don’t know what to do about that.
Care about others.
I do, I think they’re great.
Care about them more than you.
What good would I be doing for my own purpose by ignoring my own desires?
And that’s what makes you self-centered.
Seems like one has to be…
Why?
Because when I’m centered, that’s when I’m most capable.
Capable of what?
Doing everything better.
Then why not get better at caring about others?
I can.
Then do it.
I do.
Then why do they think you’re self-centered?
They must see how empowered I am.
As in…
Like a sun.
So, they’re like planets?
Kind of… Sometimes, I guess.
Little dominating, no?
Not always, it changes, sometimes I’m smaller.
So, it’s a competition…
Just trying my best at life.
What if someone else’s best is better?
All I can worry about is my own.
Is it something that actually worries you?
Uhh… sometimes, sure.
Why?
Feels like it’s off track.
From what?
Where I want it.
Are you really in charge of where it goes?
With every action I make.
Really?
Seems that way.
Then what actions work best?
At what?
Putting your life back on track.
I guess those that fulfill my needs.
Being?
Happiness, accomplishment, appreciation, I dunno, love.
How do you get them?
I dunno… by giving them?
To who?
Others.
Do you?
Huh?
Do you give those things to others?
No, I guess not.
Why?
…because I only think about myself.
But the best way to help yourself–
Is to give others what I wanna receive.
Sounds like a pretty selfish thing to do.
Then I should be good at it.
They might stop calling you self-centered…
So?
So, what happens if they start calling you selfless?
I tell them why they’re stupid.
They might not take kindly.
Doesn’t matter, I’m self-centered.
Is that caring about others?
Dammit.
Good try though…
We finished here?
Probably never.
Can I at least take a burrito break?
Will you share it?
You’re just a disembodied voice in my head…
I still like burritos.
Fine, I’ll share it.
See? Progress already.
You’re kind of a dick.
A helpful dick.
Still a dick.
You’re welcome.

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